Saturday, 22 August 2015

Is your kid an orphan?

Yesterday, I met a girl, less than 2 years whose parents noticed her unexplainable awareness of her vagina. She always moved away whenever they attempted to clean that area while bathing her, so they got worried and came to the clinic.
After examination we realised that this young girl that couldn't even coherently express herself yet had been sexually abused. 

Of course, we got the usual reaction : shock, denial, despair, anger, rage, disbelief, horror bla bla bla.

As we tried to ask the father further questions about his daughter's daily activities and upkeep, we realised the most annoying thing: this man didn't know the name of his daughter's creche  or after school care centre! He had to call his wife to find out!

Though I was livid, I comported myself and behaved like the professional I am. 
Believe me, if I had my way, I would have given the guy a piece of my mind; but then I would be missing a portion of my mind by now if I did so.

Here's the gist:

With the rate of sexual abuse sky rocketing and the number of child victims increasing these days, couples need to sit down and decide if they know and have what it takes to be a parent.

You see majority of the victims and culprits have one thing in common : ' a deficient home'.

Being a parent isn't synonymous with being able to donate a sperm or contribute an egg to the formation of an embryo;
It also goes beyond possessing the ability to provide a home and good education for your offsprings.
No sir!

Being a parent is a role that requires commitment, availability, responsibility, preparedness and a lot of resources ( financial, mental, emotional etc). 

I mean, I am not a parent ( yet) but with the things I have read, heard and seen in the past one year, i know that parenting isn't something you go into because ' it's the next step'. 

You need to count the cost before you begin this journey ( even the bible warns about not going to war if you are not sure about your resources) . 
You may say ' but parenting isn't war' - true. But parenting is synonymous with building a life and that same scripture warns against starting a building project without checking your treasury first!

A friend said that a lot of kids are orphans even though their parents aren't 6 feet below yet, and I agree with him. 

Please folks, get involved in your child's life. Be their friend, gain their confidence, watch out for them. Your work or ambition shouldn't take you away from their lives.  

Too many predators are out there lurking, ready to pounce on your kids while you aren't watching. And the bitter truth is that statistics have shown thatt over 90 percent of these predators are people you know, in fact your kids refer to most of them as ' uncle ' and 'Aunty '.

Please let's reduce the statistics of child sexual abuse by becoming more responsible in our parenting role. 
God forbid that the next child I see in my clinic with a similar story is your daughter or son; but God has given you this responsibility, take it as you take your job - SERIOUSLY!!!

Remember: 'your child needs your presence more than your presents' .

1 comment:

  1. Oh ma God! This came out so strong. I love the line: 'your child needs your presence more than your presents'. U see, people now see parental responsibility as a Hobby. I'll like to recommend to All Parents the principle of Training. They should find out more about the word, TRAINING; Then apply it on their children. Raising a child is a mandate from God on all parents. I believe God that we that still got the chance will correct this menace, at least, to a great extents. Thank you for bringing this up... More grace. (VCN reporting))


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